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Underwater: Movie Review

1/27/2020

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I recently went and saw the movie, Underwater and I have to say, I really enjoyed it. It spoke to me on a Lovecraftian level. First off, here’s the synopsis:

Disaster strikes more than six miles below the ocean surface when water crashes through the walls of a drilling station. Led by their captain, the survivors realize that their only hope is to walk across the seafloor to reach the main part of the facility. But they soon find themselves in a fight for their lives when they come under attack from mysterious and deadly creatures that no one has ever seen.

First off, without getting into any spoilers, let’s go over the good parts of this movie. I am not a huge fan of Kristen Stewart, but in this film she did great. They cast her perfectly for the character she was supposed to play and she did a fine job. Second, I always find T.J. Miller funny, and he didn’t disappoint this time around. He added much needed comic relief to an otherwise tension-packed film. Third, the director, film crew, and writers did a wonderful job utilizing isolation in this film. I’ve always found that horror works best when the characters are isolated from the outside world, and since this movie is set six miles underwater, you really can’t get much more isolated than that. Fourth, they didn’t reveal the monster too fast. Movie monsters do well to stay hidden, showing up only in glimpses or deep shadows. The magic is broken once we get the full reveal. It wasn’t until very late in the film that they showed the monsters in their entirety.
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Now, let’s get into the bad, and there was some bad. For one, this is an underwater research facility. Knowing what I know of government facilities in extreme locations, is space equity. In other words, there won’t be lots of open space. 
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This movie opens showing wide hallways and an otherwise empty locker room that is frickin’ huge! No way are they going to go through the time and effort to build such a facility with that much empty space. Second, I had to roll my eyes when we see the peeps getting into their underwater pressure suits and they tell the newbie research assistant (a woman), ‘oh, you got to take off your pants because they won’t fit in the suit.’ At first, I was like, sure, okay whatever. But at one point we see a few of the characters get out of their suit and of course, the women are wearing nothing but sports bras and panties. The dudes…t-shirts and boxers that are baggy as all get-out. If you’re going to make a rule, then stick with it. I can go along with your bullshit rules as long as everyone plays by the same ones. The pants can’t fit…why is that? Too baggy? Then a t-shirt shouldn’t work either. They could have solved this by making them wear some special wetsuit or something like that other than making it about gratuitous skin shots.

There were a couple of other things I liked and disliked, but we’ll get into that in the spoilery section below. Overall though, the pacing was great, the tension was somewhat, and the story was fun. It’s not a deep movie (other than being six miles deep), but it was highly entertaining.

​I give it 4/5 underwater research facilities. 
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Now, on to the spoilery section. You have been warned.
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Still here? Cool beans. We’ll flip the script here and I’ll start with somewhat I didn’t like spoilers. First off, it is way too easy to blow that facility to hell and back. Kristen Stewart only had to pull up a page on a touch a screen and then move some sliders, then we were into a 1 min countdown to self-destruct. No special codes or key cards. Nothing. Just flip to page two and slid the levels and kaboom. What the hell? Second, there were odd things playing in the background, like touristy music or welcome to Roebuck Station audio. This is an underwater mining/drilling facility, not a tourist destination. I can’t imagine that they’d be playing that crap over the speakers. But what do I know? Then, during the end credits we see newspaper clippings stating the company was going to go back and rebuild the facility and start drilling again. START. DRILLING. AGAIN. As if they didn’t’ learn their GD lesson the first time around.

As for the good, and this is where the movie sold it for me, was with the big baddy monster. It was a huge leviathan/kraken looking thing! It was amazing. They showed you the whole creature, but it was well done and near the end and so very worth it. I was instantly thinking Dagon or Cthulhu when I saw that sucker. I love that it was “woken” up by the drilling and came to wreck some souls.
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Super fun show. I totally recommend this movie if you’re into shows like Alien and the like. 
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    C.R. Langille writes horror, fantasy, urban-fantasy, dark fantasy, and is considering stepping into the sci-fi realm. He has a grasp of survival techniques, and has been a table-top gamer for over 16 years.

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